Worries of Parents of Gifted and Twice-Exceptional Children: A Research Study
Gail Post, PhD and Kali Fedor, EdD
Parents struggle with worries. It comes with the territory.
Parents of gifted children often feel stressed, frustrated about their child’s limited educational options, and grapple with the advocacy demands placed upon them. Traditional parenting strategies don’t apply, and many parents feel overwhelmed with the task of raising a child with so much intellectual curiosity, intensity, and heightened sensitivity. Parenting worries can extend beyond the present day and often include anxiety about their child’s future.
Research on the parent’s lived experience while raising a gifted child, though, is quite limited, with most research targeting how the parent’s behavior impacts their child.1. The few theoretical and research articles available have highlighted the unique challenges parents of the gifted face, including stress, self-doubt, social isolation, frustration with their child’s school, and struggles with the parenting role.2-7
Parents of twice-exceptional children (with co-existing conditions, such as ADHD, a learning disability, autism spectrum disorder, a sensory processing disorder, or a mental health diagnosis) confront additional parenting challenges. Accommodations and specially designed instructional options are often necessary to address both the child’s cognitive strengths, along with their twice-exceptional condition(s). Several studies of parents of twice-exceptional children have described the parent’s stress, dissatisfaction with the schools, advocacy struggles, and worries about their child’s future happiness and success.8-10
Parenting Bright Minds with Complex Needs: What Concerns Parents of Gifted and Twice-Exceptional Children Most11
As a clinical psychologist, parenting consultant, author, and parent, I am well aware that the parent’s experience is frequently ignored. I partnered with fellow gifted advocate, Kali Fedor, EdD, with the hopes of understanding more about the gifted parenting experience. We launched an online survey of parents of gifted and twice-exceptional children, ages 6-18. Demographic information was obtained, and 847 participants responded to 40 questions related to parenting concerns and worries. They were asked to rate their level of concern on a 5-point scale ranging from “never” to “always.” Questions included themes associated with academic concerns, social/emotional well-being, motivational concerns (such as underachievement or executive functioning difficulties), and the parent’s personal reactions and emotions. Over half of the parents (56.4%) indicating that their child had been diagnosed with a twice-exceptional condition.
Parents of gifted children worry… and parents of twice-exceptional children worry even more!
Some highlights of this study include the following:
1. Parents of gifted and twice-exceptional children worry about their child.
Regardless of whether their gifted child has a twice-exceptional condition or not, more than half of the survey participants responded that they are “Always” or “Often” worried or concerned about their child’s experience or behavior associated with the following:
Boredom and disengagement at school
Whether they are receiving a challenging education
Overthinking
Whether they will reach their potential
Organizational skills/time management
Social skills, finding friends, and fitting in with peers
Anxiety
2. Strong reactions were expressed related to their lived experience as parents.
More than half of the survey participants, regardless of whether their gifted child had a twice-exceptional condition, responded that they “Always” or “Often” experienced the following personal concerns, emotions, or reactions:
Feeling grateful that their child is so creative, intellectually curious, sensitive or empathetic
A daunting level of responsibility for guiding their child to find the best educational path
Feeling grateful that their child excels in and enjoys school
Feeling misunderstood by those without gifted children
Feeling uncertain about how much to push their child
3. Parents of twice-exceptional children expressed greater levels of worry and concern.
Parents of twice-exceptional children endorsed a greater and statistically significant level of worry and concern than parents of gifted children on 33 of 40 questions. Those items with the greatest level of significant differences included the following:
Anxiety
Misunderstanding from other adults directed toward their child
Depression
Organizational skills/time management
Distractibility
Feeling conflicted over wishing their child was “normal” like other children
Feeling misunderstood by those without gifted children.
Common threads… and some differences
The study’s findings highlight the emotional complexity inherent in parenting both gifted and twice-exceptional children. Parents worry about a range of concerns, including their child’s academic, social, and emotional well-being, along with motivational challenges. And while parenting stress among parents of the gifted is widespread, results found a disproportionately greater level of worry and concern among families of twice-exceptional children.
This study also affirmed that parenting concerns extend beyond the gifted child’s needs into the lived experiences of parents themselves. Emotional impacts, such as feeling misunderstood, uncertainty about how much to push their child academically, and uncomfortable emotions over wishing for normalcy, reflect deep personal struggles that often go unseen by educators, treatment professionals, and even friends or extended family.
These insights legitimize the very real distress parents of the gifted and twice-exceptional endure.
This study reinforces the importance of considering the parent’s perspective in policy, practice, and research, along with more compassionate, informed, and holistic approaches to support both neurodiverse children and their families. There is a need for safe spaces, whether through counseling, support groups, or school partnerships, where parents of the gifted can process and express their emotional experiences without fear of stigma or judgment.
If you are the parent of a gifted or twice-exceptional child, please appreciate that your distress and concerns are real, commonplace, and take their toll. Support may be found through a variety of resources, including gifted parenting support and advocacy groups or workshops; local, state-based, or national gifted education organizations; friends and family who truly understand; or licensed mental health professionals familiar with giftedness and neurodivergence.
Find the gifted parenting support you need! It will benefit both you and your child.
References
1. Jolly, J. L., & Matthews, M. S. (2012). A critique of the literature on parenting gifted learners. Journal for the Education of the Gifted, 35(3), 259-290. https://doi.org/10.1177/0162353212451703
2. Peebles, J. L., Mendaglio, S., & McCowan, M. (2023). The experience of parenting gifted children: A thematic analysis of interviews with parents of elementary-age children. Gifted Child Quarterly, 67(1), 18-27. https://doi.org/10.1177/00169862221120418
3. Pfeiffer, S. I. (2023). Parenting from the heart: Raising resilient and successful smart kids. Taylor & Francis. https://doi.org/10.4324/9781003287070
4. Post, G. (2022). The gifted parenting journey: A guide to self-discovery and support for families of gifted children. Gifted Unlimited.
5. Renati, R., Bonfigilio, N. S., & Pfeiffer, S. (2017). Challenges raising a gifted child: Stress and resilience factors within the family. Gifted Education International, 33(2), 145-162. https://doi.org/10.1177/0261429416650948
6. Rimlinger, N. A. (2015). Dwelling on the right side of the curve: An exploration of the well-being of parents of gifted children. Doctoral dissertation: The Australian National University. https://doi.org/10.25911/5d7637355aa43
7. Silverman, L. K., & Golon, A. S. (2008). Clinical practice with gifted families. Handbook of giftedness in children: Psychoeducational theory, research, and best practices (pp. 199-222). Springer. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-77004-8
8. Besnoy, K. D., Swoszowski, N. C., Newman, J. L., Floyd, A., Jones, P., & Byrne, C. (2015). The advocacy experiences of parents of elementary age, twice-exceptional children. Gifted Child Quarterly, 59(2), 108-123. https://doi.org/10.1177/0016986215569275
9. Dare, L., & Nowicki, E. A. (2015). Twice-exceptionality: Parents’ perspectives on 2e identification. Roeper Review, 37(4), 208-218. https://doi.org/10.1080/02783193.2015.1077911
10. Duplenne, L., & Bourdin, B. (2025). Investigation of parental stress in parents of children with high intellectual potential. Gifted Education International, 41(3), 335-360. https://doi.org/10.1177/02614294251335557
11. Post, G., & Fedor, K. (2026). Parenting bright minds with complex needs: What concerns parents of gifted and twice-exceptional children most. Gifted Education International, 0/0. https://doi.org/10.1177/02614294261416303
Gail Post, PhD, is a clinical psychologist and author of The Gifted Parenting Journey. She provides psychotherapy, and parent consultation for the intellectually and musically gifted. Parent of two gifted young adults, she has written hundreds of blog posts, articles, online publications and book chapters about giftedness.
Kali Fedor, EdD, has over 20 years of teaching experience and serves as Assistant Professor at Commonwealth University of PA. Her research interests include social-emotional learning, twice-exceptional learners, parent perspectives, social pragmatic communication disorders, and educational advocacy.
