You Are Not Your Struggles
Linda Kreger Silverman, Ph.D
Gifted Development Center
When an infant is born, we are filled with love for this precious Being who has chosen to share our journey with us. Infants often enter the world with a cry, but we do not label them “cry babies.” Crying is what they do, not who they are.
We all struggle with some type of challenge. This is the nature of being human. What a dull life you would have if you had nothing to overcome! The same is true for your children. Be grateful for their trials and help them build confidence in their ability to face anything life sends their way.
It is sad that the only way to gain accommodations in school is to label issues as “disorders.” Medical diagnoses are required for insurance reimbursement for psychological services, as well as to enable clients to obtain extra time on College Board examinations, access to recorded textbooks in college, use of a keyboard instead of handwriting in a classroom, use of a calculator during math tests, and all the other modifications neurodiverse students need to succeed. In the last 42 years, GDC has developed countless 504 Plans. I am grateful that laws exist to protect children who learn differently, and I am grateful that we have been able to help thousands of children gain accommodations under those laws. But those labels do not define who these individuals really are. They are their giftedness, which is lifelong, not their disabilities, which can be overcome.
If you look closely at a “disorder,” you will usually discover a gift. While the weakness may make school learning difficult, it facilitates other realms of experience. Many dyslexic children I have encountered are also psychic. Impairment of the left hemisphere appears to enable more powerful development of the right hemisphere. Artists, designers, technological wizards, inventors, builders, empaths, brilliant problem solvers who make life-changing discoveries, often struggled in school. These gifted innovators did not allow their struggles to define them.
I wish we could change the name “Twice Exceptional” to “Gifted Plus,” so that the emphasis is on giftedness, rather than on disabilities. I realize we cannot do that in our reports, because the reports are written to gain our clients legal accommodations. But I urge you to do this in your hearts and in your perspective of yourself and your children. You are not broken. They are not broken. All your struggles, and theirs, are necessary ingredients in fulfilling your life’s purpose.
